Fic, and an amusingly nuts log...

Karma Aster: And preggers...er, we're not talking the Spawn of Pete here, are we?
Analyssie: no. ew.
Analyssie: Jack's HeroSperm.
Karma Aster: Sweet.
Karma Aster: Do they get little microscopic capes?
Analyssie: *dies*
Analyssie: And masks, and little fencing foils!
Karma Aster: And little tiny wide-brimmed hats with feathers in them!
Karma Aster: It's very single-cell Scarlet Pimpernal!
Analyssie: *nods*
Analyssie: Complete with the foppish accent, and lace when off-duty.
Karma Aster: Oh, of course.
Karma Aster: Okay, damn, that is the single weirdest visual I have ever had.
Analyssie: *cackles*
Karma Aster: Sheesh...so do Pete's have this whole Count Rugen thing going on?
Karma Aster: I mean, complete with six fingers on the right hand?
Karma Aster: And the gleeful sadism?
Analyssie: yes!
Karma Aster: Or would that be Ba'al's?
Analyssie: Luckily, Sam's, er, birth control is made of naquadah-laced trinium.
Karma Aster: (dies)
Analyssie: (Jack's sweet-talk it)

- *smirk*

Fic (that has nothing to do with the log)

Disclaimer: Not mine. Rating: R/nc17. Sex. Corny.
notes: sleepy now. But. Porn! Pairing: Sam/Jack. Slightly ooc. Mention of Pete. Season 8. Going to bed now. This would, btw, be NOS' fault for suggesting that Sam and Jack would EVER, uh... anyway.

Virtual Fantasy vs. Reality
by ALC Punk!
( Read more... )

ofmg... someone PLEASE explain this to me...

WHY do people want fic where Sam gets beaten up/abused by Pete, and then Jack goes and kicks his ass??

WHY?

First. If Pete were to raise a hand to her, he would find his ass SO DUMPED he'd be digging himself out of the landfill in Denver.

Second. Sam has been hanging around Teal'c, the marines, and JACK for how long? and they don't think she's picked up a little more fighting skill? (she kicked the Turghan's ass, people) If Pete succeeded in actually touching her? She would probably kick his ass herself.

Physical abuse is NOT something she'd tolerate. It might affect her job performance, for one thing. For another, she isn't going to stay with a guy who's abusing her! Her self-esteem ain't quite that low, thanks.

Another thing I keep seeing: Sam hides these abuse injuries from the SGC's doctors...

Mandatory post-mission physicals. There is NO EXCUSE that will get you out of one -- hello? Threat to the planet if you're a goa'uld?

And if she does get one? Those doctors are GOING TO NOTICE patterns of bruising, cracked ribs, and fingermarks on that pale, pale skin that bruises so easily...

Neither Brightman nor Janet is going to believe she got injured on the mission if she's the only one, and none of the guys remember it!

Makes note: Write a fic where Pete attempts to hit Sam and she kicks his ass, dumps it, then stalks off to kill Ba'al or something. *mutters* (ps. am leaving in five minutes for home)