What even is this (weird fanfiction.net review)

So, I'm used to "This was nice" and "Neat!" and "I liked this" as reviews at fanfiction.net. I've even gotten longer ones or shorter ones (I think I have a "yay" somewhere).

But today. Today, I received this:

Nicksnow chapter 1 . Dec 2
Nickgig SEX. Xxxxx I love my man and I love seeing women doing women and I have a tax write a gray more power to the women fucking nap if that can fuck the women with and I CK as in 0W Nick Snow so as sex having sex let’s get the women gonna put my dick in the woman but hole put the

And now I'm full of questions:

1. This was posted on a het fic (Sam/Jack).
2. As far as I know, Sam and Jack did not accidentally get married for the tax breaks.

"write a gray more power to the women" what. What is this even.

Are power naps involved with this dick invasion? Can sex have sex with sex? Is this like Insexion? Sex within a sex within a sex?

Nick also apparently loves his man. Not sure who his man is. Can taxes write porn? Dirty little numbers, who knows what they get up to behind closed doors.

ffs self, don't write an essay

But, seriously, I have such a specific type when it comes to my femslash pairings:

The straight-laced one + the slightly amoral one who knocks them off their socks.

Sam Carter.
Elizabeth Weir.
Yaz (from Who).
Toshiko Sato.
Maria Hill.
Janet Scott.
Caroline Todd.
Jane Austen.
Virginia Woolf.
Mary Morstan (even if I headcanon her a bit amoral, she's certainly more upstanding than her lover).
Melanie Bush.
Romanadvoratrelundar.
Boomer.

Kara Thrace (Vala Mal Doran).
Teyla Emmagan.
Thirteen.
Martha Jones.
Pepper Potts.
Rachel Bailey.
Sue White.
Clara Oswald.
River Song.
Irene Adler.
Ace.
Leela of the Sevateam
Caprica Six.

(Seriously, when I realized this last night, I was like "fuck, no wonder I'm already shipping Yaz/Thirteen")

Which is really not always consistent, because Clara/River is a thing. And Ace/Benny Summerfield, too (I would classify neither of them as straight-laced, Benny likes alcohol far too much).