lyssie: (Ficbutton stolen from A.j.)
lyssie ([personal profile] lyssie) wrote2005-08-04 05:34 am

fic: 'Lantis: Debt to Karma

Disclaimer: Not Mine. Rating: er.. 13+
Spoilers: Siege 1/2/3, Intruder, season 2.
Genre: gen, post-episode for Siege 3
Character: Elizabeth Weir
Notes: er. I think this is [livejournal.com profile] anr's fault, really. And I don't think I've seen something like this out there, but, er, if I have, sorry. Title swiped from Depeche Mode's 'Dream On'.

Debt to Karma
by ALC Punk!

She wakes up screaming.

Except there's no sound, so she can't be screaming, can she?

All she can smell is sweat and salt, and the strange mustiness that never quite goes away from Atlantis, even now, after so many months.

Elizabeth can feel her heart pounding too fast, adrenaline rushing through her veins and her world tilting on its axis. Except that she's safe and sound. The wraith threat is gone, Daedelus is being repaired. Soon, they'll be heading for Earth and she'll have meetings and de-briefings and so many stacks of paperwork she'll wish she never left. There will be reports to make, and requisitions to handle, and so many political moves to accomplish.

The mundane thoughts calm her nerves, and she remembers using this trick for her night terrors in college.

Her breathing slows and she relaxes back against the comfortable cushion the Athosians gifted her with, back when they were living in Atlantis. The city of dreams, her mind tosses out spitefully and a shiver drifts through her.

She wishes it had been her old night terrors, those she never remembered other than the sense of overwhelming fear.

Instead she knows exactly what she was dreaming. Her mind is decompressing, processing the last several days and letting her come to terms with it.

Not that she wants to.

Even now, she can taste the terror at the back of her throat as the genii blindfolded her and sat her in a chair and didn't touch her. The sense of menace had almost made her voice squeak, but she'd trained too long and fought vocal battles too often to give in then.

They'd demanded she come alone, and she had. They'd threatened to keep her there as punishment for the 60-plus men Major Sheppard had killed. And they hadn't.

She can still taste the relief of walking back through the gate into Atlantis to be greeted by the resolute, but terrified people there (and the musty scent of the city, salt, and Sheppard's aftershave). A part of Elizabeth thinks they didn't keep her because they were practical, expedient. They assumed she would die with Atlantis.

But she didn't die. Some of them did, but she didn't, and the wraith believe Atlantis is destroyed.

She considers adding the genii to the list of peoples they should discuss trade agreements with. After all, there is a common enemy. A snort escapes her into the darkness.

And for just a moment, the sound echoes, and she's back in that room with something dripping and no one speaking to her and the air moving just so and her eyes covered, and--her room isn't dark. Even with the lights out, there's still something luminescent in the walls that gives off enough light to see by.

The very fact of the light calms her nerves, and she releases her breath quickly, then draws in another.

Tomorrow, she will get up and face the running of her city. She will talk with Sheppard and Caldwell and McKay, and they will plan the visit back to Earth. Tomorrow, she will be Dr. Elizabeth Weir again.

But for the moment, in the almost-dark, she's Elizabeth, and she's allowed to be scared.

-f-

[identity profile] vampirehunter85.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 01:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Ohh, I like this. Particularly the last two lines, differentiating between Dr. Elizabeth Weir and Elizabeth.

Tomorrow, she will be Dr. Elizabeth Weir again.

But for the moment, in the almost-dark, she's Elizabeth, and she's allowed to be scared.


V. good.
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 06:00 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. =)

I think there is that clear delineation at times, especially when they're in a crisis.

[identity profile] anastasiab.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 02:09 pm (UTC)(link)
(and the musty scent of the city, salt, and Sheppard's aftershave).

Oh, nice. This whole thing had a very lyrical feel, a nice hopeful melancholy. I loved it.
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 06:01 pm (UTC)(link)
I figured Shep over-uses the aftershave...

Thank you =)

[identity profile] mylittleredgirl.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 03:56 pm (UTC)(link)
I LOVE YOU SOOOOOOOOOOOO.

I was so worried that moment would never, ever get mentioned again by anyone.

Now I have everything I want. Yay. *claps hands for the great joy that is fanfic*
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 06:02 pm (UTC)(link)
You mean no one else has? Yay! Seriously, in some ways, I think Lizzie going to the genii is far more heroic than Shep flying a jumper full of explosive into a wraith ship.

*kicks fandom*

Thank you =)

[identity profile] neonhummingbird.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 07:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Very nice job of giving us aftermath of something that has been largely ignored. Great internal Elizabeth, and the last two lines are excellent.
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you. Mostly, I don't expect SG to ever deal with follow-up to *any*thing deep or emotional.

[identity profile] goodisrelative.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 07:30 pm (UTC)(link)
I totally agree with vampirehunter85... the last 2 lines are *the* best.

Great story! :)
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-04 08:16 pm (UTC)(link)
Thank you =)
anr: (weir breathe)

[personal profile] anr 2005-08-05 12:34 am (UTC)(link)
AIEEEEEE! Oh, I am so, so, SO happy to take the blame for this. I *love* that moment because it was such a risky thing for her to do and no one ever commented on it! (And was it you who I discussed Sheppard's possible reactions to finding out where she'd gone with, and the possible AU's if they HADN'T let her come back -- unharmed or not at all?! I think it was.)

She can still taste the relief of walking back through the gate into Atlantis to be greeted by the resolute, but terrified people there (and the musty scent of the city, salt, and Sheppard's aftershave).

I think you know which part of that sentence I love the most and I really, really do love it. EEEEEE!

*LOVES*
anr: (Default)

[personal profile] anr 2005-08-05 12:35 am (UTC)(link)
Also? You had her wake up screaming. *MORE LOVE*
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-05 02:43 am (UTC)(link)
*squeaks*

It really was your fault, too. And I don't remember why anymore. Maybe something about the ficathon, and the Storm/Eye caps and Little Red having her Lizzie blindfolded icon. Hrm.

I have no idea if it was me you discussed it with, though I think that WAS a discussion that's happened more than once (I'm very flaky like that).

*snuggles*

Thank you. =)

And I had to make her wake up screaming because she couldn't scream then.
anr: (Default)

[personal profile] anr 2005-08-08 04:24 pm (UTC)(link)
Well, whatever the fault: MUCH LOVE! for it. People need to write more Lizzie fic that gives her issues and the smell of John's aftershave. In fact: I insist. *nods*

[identity profile] elvinborn.livejournal.com 2005-08-05 12:59 am (UTC)(link)
beautifully well done
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-05 02:43 am (UTC)(link)
Thank you =)

[identity profile] thekatebeyond.livejournal.com 2005-08-05 01:27 am (UTC)(link)
Fascinating is the word that comes to mind.
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[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-08-05 02:43 am (UTC)(link)
Whoot! Thank you =)