lyssie: (hell)
lyssie ([personal profile] lyssie) wrote2004-02-18 10:05 pm

And now, a rant, from your sponsor...

When one cruises fanfiction archives (ff'net in particular) one comes across a growing phenomenon. I don't care where it started, but it needs to stop.

This phenomenon is one of the stupidest, dumbest things I have seen.

A recent example: "Cordano".

I am lucky enough to be able to decipher that. Knowing it's an 'ER' fic helps. The above word denotes the relationship of Elizabeth Corday and Robert 'The Rocket' Romano. Aside from the logical and emotional difficulties with that pairing, what is so hard about simply stating Corday/Romano? (I could easily be misspelling Elizabeth's last name, by the way. It's been a while).

Having wondered, I have come to the conclusion that it is simply too hard for these people to properly designate things. They think it's cute. They think it makes them Kewl.

And I simply want them culled from my planet.

There have been others. Kitty/Kurt in X-Men: Evolution (a breeding ground for maladjusted illiterates, if there ever was one) is 'Kurtty'. Kitty/Pietro is 'Kietro'. (I suppose this makes Scully/Mulder 'Sculdy'). Abby Lockhart/John Carter is 'Carby'. And Buffy/Spike is 'Spuffy'. Only the last is at all palatable. And that's simply because it sounds like what that relationship was: Crap.

So. Until the 'net suddenly is saved from these stupid fuckers, I suggest titling all relationships with number designations. Jack/Sam is now '2'; John/Aeryn is '4'; and Scott/Jean '1'; Nate/Dom? '13'.

Tomorrow, I will work up the complete "Fan-Fiction Relationship Number Designation Guide for Idiots".

But until then, I shall ponder the illiteracy of the youth of America.

[identity profile] niira.livejournal.com 2004-02-18 08:31 pm (UTC)(link)
eesh. there's stuff like that with digimon fics (taito, yamachi, etc), but at least those SOUND decent >_<;;

Re:

[identity profile] edana-ni-emer.livejournal.com 2004-02-19 11:38 am (UTC)(link)
Well, by your lights, the Gundam Wing fandom does it right. Each character has a numeric designation, and the specific type of relationship is indicated by the symbols between them. Therefore, Heero/Duo friendship would be 1+2, while a slashy or yaoi-y relationship would be 1x2. :-)

(After you've been in GW fandom for a while, algebra starts to look like porn...)