I completely agree with you that the focus of the entire finale should not be on who Kara ends up with. That said, as a diehard shipper myself, I can understand the disappointment and frustration that one experiences if your couple doesn't end up together...HOWEVER...

I don't think the K/L shippers should be blaming Katee for this. While she may've had some influence over the storyline, her decision wasn't based on "well, I just really like this relationship more". Her decision was based on what she thought was best for her character and I think it's an actor's duty to step up and fight for that, even if they don't win.

So, anyway, I understand the sadness one feels when things don't go their way but I don't think the actors should be blamed for it...And I don't think it should be the only thing taken away from an entire series, especially one with so many complex characters and storylines.