lyssie: (Liz snark Jack saving Sam)
lyssie ([personal profile] lyssie) wrote2005-04-04 05:07 am
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Jack is thought to be dead. Sam has to rely on Daniel for strength to have Jack’s baby. What happens when Jack walks through the gate, years after he became MIA? and where has he been?

....there are no words...
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[identity profile] elly427.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:15 am (UTC)(link)
Honey, there are two: bad. fic.

*snuggles you*

[identity profile] http://users.livejournal.com/cecilialisbon_/ 2005-04-04 10:27 am (UTC)(link)
Ack.

[identity profile] foenix.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:31 am (UTC)(link)
In fariness, that's not an inherently bad plot. A bit cliche, but a fair enough idea to explore under such circumstances.

Just can't get past the "Sam and Jack having a baby" part of it.
ext_962: (heart jack)

[identity profile] surreallis.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:44 am (UTC)(link)
Oh,there's words... you just don't want to say them because you'll go to hell. ;)
ext_18106: (Default)

[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:54 am (UTC)(link)
Oh, I do want to. In fact, I keep saying them in my head right now.

[identity profile] livilla.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:50 am (UTC)(link)
I... *passes out*

[identity profile] nostalgia-lj.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:50 am (UTC)(link)

"WTF?!" screamed Sam, hitting Jack with her tender wee woman-hands. "WHERE THE FUCK WERE YOU?! I HAD TO SCREW DANIEL!"

Jack winced under the woman-hands-thing. "I was busy! I have my life, woman!"

"I HAD UR BEBI!" she wailed in netspeak.

"...but we never had sex." Jack was Confused.

She kneed him in the balls.
ext_18106: (Default)

[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 10:54 am (UTC)(link)
....you know I love you, right?

*dies*

[identity profile] foenix.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 08:14 pm (UTC)(link)
"Jack was Confused."

And all was right with the world. ;)

J

[identity profile] rosewildeirish.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 12:04 pm (UTC)(link)
Sure there are. "Hack". "Trite". "Cliched".

*rifles around* Tons more here, if you want...

[identity profile] rosewildeirish.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 12:08 pm (UTC)(link)
"Out of character"! That's three of 'em!

...damn, she said "have" Jack's baby. If she'd'a said raise Jack's baby, it might've been fun to contemplate a fic where some other chick was pregnant and dumps the kid on the SGC.
ext_18106: (Default)

[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 12:28 pm (UTC)(link)
Laira's baby, of course.

[identity profile] karma-aster.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 12:38 pm (UTC)(link)
"Wait...we have a kid?"

"Yep," Sam replied, straightening a stack of papers on her desk.

"But...you...we..." Jack stammered.

"The settlement I got from the birth control company paid for a lot of her upkeep," she answered, matter-of-factly.

"So..." Jack rubbed at the back of his neck uncomfortably, "you're not mad at me?"

"Oh, I'm pretty pissed at you," Sam replied, "I knew you had the Ancient gene, Jack, but you should have mentioned that you had the Mary Sue one too."

"...Mary Sue?" Jack asked, a look of pure horror settling on his face.

"Yep." Sam nodded solemnly and sipped at her coffee.
ext_18106: (Default)

[identity profile] lyssie.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 12:58 pm (UTC)(link)
hahahahahahah!!!!

*so not coherent*

[identity profile] karma-aster.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 05:26 pm (UTC)(link)
Dude! Sam is reguarly getting sexed by Jack and his Hero!Sperm! Of course she's got some damn good birth control going on!

Sheesh...did these kids ever consider that half the women at the SGC are probably already on birth control for the simple reason of controlling thier menstrual cycle while out in the field? Or would that involve using logic?

[identity profile] splash-the-cat.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 01:27 pm (UTC)(link)
Bwah!

[identity profile] antikythera.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 02:11 pm (UTC)(link)
Wait, which of them has the Mary Sue gene? I'm not in the fandom... but I'd suspect that one or both of them become canon!Sues once in a while...

[identity profile] karma-aster.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 05:22 pm (UTC)(link)
Actually, at this point, couldn't we consider the Ancient gene to pretty much be the Mary Sue gene? At least it seems that way with the female Ancients we've seen.

[identity profile] thekatebeyond.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 03:45 pm (UTC)(link)
Sam has to rely on Daniel for strength to have Jack’s baby.

You're reading it all wrong. See, someone had to have the strength to have Jack's baby -- the Asgard need it, but someone has to, well, grow it for them. So, when Jack disappeared and left Sam in charge, she relied on Daniel to carry out this important task. They used Goa'uld technology to make him a Jaffa-like womb and he was implanted with the embryo. Sam would have done it herself, of course, except genetic testing secretly revealed it to be Jack and Thor's love child, and she was afraid it would have a huge frickin' Asgard cranium.

I'm, uhh, going to go wash up now. I suddenly feel like I have bad fic cooties.

[identity profile] cosmic.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 03:53 pm (UTC)(link)
Awwwwm that sounds so deliciously cliched. And let me guess: of course Jack thinks it's Daniel's baby, and he doesn't want to disrupt their happyhappiness! But they haven't ever ever even had sex, because Sam still misses her twu wuv! And Daniel has cooties!
ext_18985: (geeky)

Dude.

[identity profile] aj.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 04:26 pm (UTC)(link)
There are words.

"Shitty." "Stupid." "Frightening." "Moronic." Just to name a few.

[identity profile] swiftangel.livejournal.com 2005-04-04 05:34 pm (UTC)(link)
Um.... this may have already been pointed out... but how could she be about to deliver Jack's baby if Jack has been MIA for years? That's one long ass pregnancy...
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