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vague thoughts of consternation
More rules to write Stargate fic by:
1. if your fic contains Pete Shanahan, please warn us. Some of us don't like him simply because we dislike the character (corollary: if your fic contains Malek or Kanan, warnings are essential). And being subjected to him is irritating. Though not as irritating as sappy Sam/Pete fic... which reminds me of really bad Rogue/Remy fic. *shudder* (dude, R/R should also have warnings. In six-inch tall bright red letters)
2. Sidebar to #1: if your fic contains Pete Wisdom, more power to you. There isn't enough of him.
3. Grace. Stop it. Sam is NOT having a child named Grace. Hell, the little brat wasn't ever fucking named. Stop making her Sam/Jack, Sam/Pete, Sam/Daniel, Sam/Teal'c/Bra'tac's child from the future who was there to saver her/was ascended and came back in time/etc. Children from the future are over and done with. The messiah is now lobotomized.
4. Sam is NOT young enough to have twins and twins and then another baby. And there's this thing called birth control. Sam would be on it. And, even if she's only 35, having a child every year probably isn't something she would WANT to do. Not to mention that there's no need to repopulate the entire damned planet on her own. So stop it already.
5. Jack, Jr. No. Just, NO. And stop with the Johnathans. It's irritating. (I don't care what was shown in 'Entity', people. For once, I think canon is fucked in the head).
6. Stop demonizing Laira, Sara O'Neill, Sarah Gardner, Jonas Quinn, Kynthia, Jonas Hansen, Pete Shanahan, Sam Carter, Daniel Jackson, Teal'c, Jack O'Neill, General Hammond, Narim, Simon, Martouf, Anise/Freya, and any other character you feel you have to, just so YOUR ship can be shown to be the bestest EVER. None of these people is inherently evil, and all have very human characteristics that do NOT include world domination or being satan/jealous of everyone and everything/a stalker/a murderer (well, Jack is, canonically in black ops/special forces, which included sniping, most likely). So stop it already. (although Narim is irritating and possibly more superior and pathetic than even the Wraith)
7. Bra'tac is a god among men. Why the hell isn't there more fic with him?
8. Stop apologizing for perceived short-comings. If you don't think you can do it, write it anyway and practice! Of course, if you tell me the fic sucks, I'll probably avoid it. So don't ask me for a review.
9. Do not, under any circumstances, place author notes in the flow of your narrative. They don't belong there, you fucking idiot.
10. Jack is not going to be all fluffy bunnies and run around telling people he loves them every hour of the day. I don't care WHAT drug he's on.
11. Neither would Sam. Daniel, might. Teal'c... well, Teal'c is also not one to speak in so many words.
12. Pets. There's no way any of SG-1 could take care of an animal. They're not on world enough to give it the proper attention, even a cat. Sam had a cat, I hear cries. Yes. She did. And it died on the Tollan homeworld, so that shows how good SHE is at taking care of her pets. Daniel doesn't have time to talk to his hamster.
huh. I think that's it, for now....
1. if your fic contains Pete Shanahan, please warn us. Some of us don't like him simply because we dislike the character (corollary: if your fic contains Malek or Kanan, warnings are essential). And being subjected to him is irritating. Though not as irritating as sappy Sam/Pete fic... which reminds me of really bad Rogue/Remy fic. *shudder* (dude, R/R should also have warnings. In six-inch tall bright red letters)
2. Sidebar to #1: if your fic contains Pete Wisdom, more power to you. There isn't enough of him.
3. Grace. Stop it. Sam is NOT having a child named Grace. Hell, the little brat wasn't ever fucking named. Stop making her Sam/Jack, Sam/Pete, Sam/Daniel, Sam/Teal'c/Bra'tac's child from the future who was there to saver her/was ascended and came back in time/etc. Children from the future are over and done with. The messiah is now lobotomized.
4. Sam is NOT young enough to have twins and twins and then another baby. And there's this thing called birth control. Sam would be on it. And, even if she's only 35, having a child every year probably isn't something she would WANT to do. Not to mention that there's no need to repopulate the entire damned planet on her own. So stop it already.
5. Jack, Jr. No. Just, NO. And stop with the Johnathans. It's irritating. (I don't care what was shown in 'Entity', people. For once, I think canon is fucked in the head).
6. Stop demonizing Laira, Sara O'Neill, Sarah Gardner, Jonas Quinn, Kynthia, Jonas Hansen, Pete Shanahan, Sam Carter, Daniel Jackson, Teal'c, Jack O'Neill, General Hammond, Narim, Simon, Martouf, Anise/Freya, and any other character you feel you have to, just so YOUR ship can be shown to be the bestest EVER. None of these people is inherently evil, and all have very human characteristics that do NOT include world domination or being satan/jealous of everyone and everything/a stalker/a murderer (well, Jack is, canonically in black ops/special forces, which included sniping, most likely). So stop it already. (although Narim is irritating and possibly more superior and pathetic than even the Wraith)
7. Bra'tac is a god among men. Why the hell isn't there more fic with him?
8. Stop apologizing for perceived short-comings. If you don't think you can do it, write it anyway and practice! Of course, if you tell me the fic sucks, I'll probably avoid it. So don't ask me for a review.
9. Do not, under any circumstances, place author notes in the flow of your narrative. They don't belong there, you fucking idiot.
10. Jack is not going to be all fluffy bunnies and run around telling people he loves them every hour of the day. I don't care WHAT drug he's on.
11. Neither would Sam. Daniel, might. Teal'c... well, Teal'c is also not one to speak in so many words.
12. Pets. There's no way any of SG-1 could take care of an animal. They're not on world enough to give it the proper attention, even a cat. Sam had a cat, I hear cries. Yes. She did. And it died on the Tollan homeworld, so that shows how good SHE is at taking care of her pets. Daniel doesn't have time to talk to his hamster.
huh. I think that's it, for now....