Yeah, it sucks. I liked the QoD, at least, in comparison to the episodes that came right before and right after it it was a masterpiece. Plus, it was the most Sam we got all season. :D But the Kara/Dee stuff vs Lee/Sam is an issue. I think it's not just fandom (though fandom makes it 100X worse than it is in the source.) Lee and Sam started off in a pissing contest but ended up bonding manfully over the shared mission. Kara and Dee were supposed to do the same thing - the writers even said one of the things they liked about the scenario was that Kara was a good enough flight instructor to teach Dee how to fly even when she was in tons of pain and high on Morpha. But they never showed us. All we got were deleted scenes of Lee and Sam commiserating over how the whole thing was Kara's fault, and Kara and Dee commiserating over how the whole thing was Kara's fault. Which is another can of worms.

The text never says either way whether they hate each other. Lee does try to be nice to Sam, though. And Sam doesn't kill him.

I think TSAR showed that they'd become somewhat close after Kara's death, so there's some basis for all the fanon. (Which I love so much more than the "Lee hates Sam because Sam is an evil abuser" fanon!) There's zero evidence that Kara hates Dee. There's some evidence that Dee blamed Kara for Lee's infidelity because it was easier than blaming him, but I think that ended after Rapture/TaB. And it didn't stop Dee from saving her, even then. Grrr. Fandom.